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May 17, 2010

Adult Sex Toys Porn Review - Pirates

I had heard about Pirates for quite some time and I was eager to review it. See, I'm fussy about porn. Most of it does absolutely nothing for me. I'm not attracted to either the men or the women in most porn, which is no mean feat because I'm bi. The endless fucking by people who look bored doesn't turn me on at all. I do like some classic porn, which I have reviewed here, but for the most part it's hard for me to find porn that pleases me. It's even harder for me to find porn that turns me on.

That is, until I finally saw Pirates. Now this is a fun movie! Made in 2005, it has it all - a plot, actors who can act, humor, gorgeous people, amazing sets and special effects (the budget for this movie was a million, and that's pretty cool considering it's porn), beautiful costumes, and candles... lots of candles.

Here's an amusing trivia tidbit about the movie from the Internet Movie Database: "Some scenes were filmed aboard the HMS Bounty, at The Pier in St. Petersburg, Florida. The city of St. Petersburg, which owns The Pier, did not realize that the film was porn; the producers represented the film as a PG-13-level comedy for television." Ha! The HMS Bounty will never live this one down!

Pirates won and was nominated for a slew of awards, including the AVN award for top selling title of the year, AVN best actor, best actress, best all-girl sex scene - video, best director, best supporting actor, best music, and much more. In all, Pirates won thirteen awards and was nominated for ten awards. Pretty spiffy.

I could see the influence of "Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse Of The Black Pearl" in this movie since quite a few of the men tried to pull off the Capt. Jack Sparrow look. These days, no self respecting pirate leaves his crow's nest without eyeliner.

The plot was loads of fun. If all the sex scenes were taken out, this movie would still make a nice stand-alone pirate flick, but of course the sex scenes only add to the enjoyment. Here's the plot summary from the Internet Movie Database, which gave Pirates a 7.5 out of 10 rating. Not bad for a porn flick.

Swash and unbuckle. In 1763, the Caribbean is awash in pirates. The worst is Stagnetti, backed by his bloodthirsty first mate, Serena. He wants the Scepter of Inca, which gives its owner great powers. To remove it from remote Calaveras Island, he needs the Dagger of Ataljuapa as well as the aid of a descendant of the family to whom the Scepter was entrusted. So, he kidnaps Manuel Valenzuela, honeymooning with the lovely Isabella. On Stagnetti's trail are pirate hunters, Captain Edward Reynolds and Jules, his commander. Edward's a bit clueless, but he does rescue Isabella. Once Stagnetti has the Dagger, the stage is set for the clash of good and evil.

I found as I watched this delightful movie that I was attracted to lots of people, in particular Jesse Jane as Jules and Evan Stone as Capt. Edward Reynolds. Other notables are Carmen Luvana, Tegan, Tommy Gunn, and Devon. Reynolds' fucking and acting came across as very hot and natural. Jesse Jane was just incredibly hot to watch. True, the actors are buff and all have been under the plastic surgeon's knife (note: every boob in this movie is fake) but I liked the hardbodies very much. This is a movie I could jerk off to.

I'm going to find more movies made by this production company, Digital Playground. There are two sequels to Pirates and I would happily jerk off to both while enjoying a good movie. The director, Joone, has quite a bit of talent. The high production values did not get past me. I found other movies by Digital Playground that I would love to see and review so that you too may enjoy them. Pirates was a blast to watch - more than once, mind you - and I highly recommend it to anyone who wants a fun and sexy porn movie to round out your evening. This movie is ideal for couples as well. Sit back, pop some popcorn, and enjoy

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Posted on May 17, 2010 at 11:01 AM | Permalink

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Comments

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