« I Just Handed In An Article | Main | Here's To Swimmin' With Bow-Legged Women »

June 30, 2006

More Fathers' Rights Backpedaling - From Dean Tong

Update January 29, 2008: Dean Tong has been arrested and charged with wife beating and witness tampering. Please see my new Dean Tong category to get the latest information.


My readers may recall that I have already posted about Dean Tong's comments excusing what Darren Mack had done. Mack had hired Tong as his forensic consultant. Now, Tong has an editorial published in the Reno Review Journal. He's engaging in more damage control, a la Glenn Sacks and Wendy McElroy, but he falls flat on his face.

Note how Tong blames "the system" for Mack, who he said "was cracking".

What happened to Darren Mack between then and June 12, when, according to police, he stabbed Charla Mack to death and shot Family Court Judge Chuck Weller with a high-powered rifle? Hindsight is 20/20, but my opinion is that this "family man turned hit man" was cracking under the strain of trying to hold onto his business, his assets and his daughter while navigating a misguided Family Court system that only poured gasoline on an already incendiary situation.

Tong also sought to place blame on Charla Mack, whom Mack had stabbed to death.

He claimed his wife and her very aggressive and competent attorney were drumming up a story to gain the upper hand in their demands for custody and assets. To wit: If she was so scared of him, why did she drive to his townhome the morning of June 12 without an adult witness by her side?

That's right. Blame a dead woman for her own murder.

I'm not surprised that Dean Tong would create excuses for what Darren Mack had done. Lots of father's rights activists are taking the "the system is to blame!" approach. Let them. It makes them look like they are making excuses for Mack's murder, shooting, and flight, which is exactly what they are doing. Tong had written that Mack "was cracking", as if his contentious divorce was to blame for him stabbing his wife to death and shooting Judge Weller.

Tong represents men who claim they have been falsely accused of abuse. That's how he makes his money. He has no training to do what he does. He is trained as an Emergency Medical Technician. As I had written in my earlier post about Tong, the test that Tong uses is the penile plethysmograph test, which is unreliable in ascertaining child sexual abuse. This test measures male sexual arousal. This test has many problems, including that it is not admitted in court under Daubert, which means that the test is scientifically unreliable. The test is "subject to fakery and voluntary control by test subjects..."

Here is one of Tong's recommendations in his op-ed for divorces to supposedly prevent contention:

Joint custody should be the preferred option. Even though the rule of law is "the child's best interests," too often it is interpreted as, "the father should get the shaft and the mom should get everything."

Tong neglected to point out that Charla and Darren Mack had joint custody. It obviously did not inspire them to get along for the sake of their children. Joint custody did not prevent Darren Mack from "cracking". It's so nice of him to write the inflammatory statement "the father should get the shaft and the mom should get everything." That makes him look petty and vindictive - not the way you want to look when talking about a man who had stabbed his wife to death, shot the judge who was hearing his case, and then fled to Mexico.

Dean Tong is a favorite amongst father' rights activists and "false allegations" supporters. He, like most of the fathers' rights activists who have written about the Mack case, continues to blame "the system" for a murder and a shooting. What Dean Tong is doing is damage control. Fathers' rights activists have made their opinions clear on message boards where they have supported Mack shooting Judge Weller. They also blame "the system" for Mack's downfall. Fathers' rights activists do not represent good men. Good, decent men who are going through divorce should not look to those groups or the individuals in them for help.

Posted on June 30, 2006 at 04:05 PM | Permalink


I sent in a letter to Reno Review. Don't even need to put Tong in the context of FR politics. Just sheer incompetence. He had a job to do. He screwed up. Well, even trained psychiatrists fail to spot sociopaths. And what was Tong's training? Dog grooming or something like that?

No different from an engineer who pronounces the levees fine --just before they crack open. It's called f---ing up, and trying to cover your sh--, darling.

Posted by: silverside at Jun 30, 2006 4:02:10 PM

Tong's training was as an EMT. I guess he went to a diploma mill to become a "forensic consultant".

Posted by: The Countess at Jun 30, 2006 4:07:20 PM

I have a coworker who is trying to get rights to visit his son, and somehow he's gotten mixed up in fathers' rights groups. It's frightening.

Posted by: sfk at Jul 1, 2006 2:31:59 PM

Oh, geez, can you talk your coworker out of getting advice from a father's rights group? The people in the group are only going to aggravate his situation and give him bad advice. He'll end up paying lots of money for a divorce/custody case that would have been better spend on paying his bills and caring for his kids. He needs a good lawyer, assuming there are no problems like domestic violence, control issues, and child abuse, and he should avoid father's rights groups like the plague.

Why can't your coworker get visitation rights? Most dads have no problem getting visitation. What's going on?

Posted by: The Countess at Jul 1, 2006 2:39:43 PM

Didja ever notice how his name sounds like Ding Dong? ;D

Posted by: Moi ;) at Jul 2, 2006 12:31:13 PM

LOL you're right.

Posted by: The Countess at Jul 2, 2006 12:34:16 PM

Countess, my ex just returned to me the copy of the Nurturing Fathers workbook I submitted to her a long time ago. If you want this copy sent to you for review my E-mail address is DLeahy@core.com. I can have it in the mail to you or any place you would get it (PO box, office, etc.) Wednesday and have it in your hands by next weekend.

Please let me know how to proceed.

The author is a guy named Mark Perlman. You can find his bio at http://www.nurturingfathers.com/

Posted by: Dennis at Jul 4, 2006 2:57:18 AM

Hi, Dennis. I'd rather not give out my mailing address. I found lots of information about the Nurturing Fathers program on a Google search. Here's one link I found. Does this sound like your program?

Nurturing Fathers Program.

I found the handbook on sale for $22.00.

Posted by: The Countess at Jul 4, 2006 8:10:04 AM

Thanks all the same for offering to send the handbook to me, Dennis.

Posted by: The Countess at Jul 4, 2006 8:10:40 AM

I figured you wouldn't give me your home address. I wasn't asking for that specifically, just any address that would eventually get you the handbook. I didn't want you to have to spend the money when I've got more than one.

Please let us know what you think when you've read your copy, and have a GREAT 4th!

I'm going to take Sam swimming today!

Posted by: Dennis at Jul 4, 2006 10:49:59 AM

Well I don't know about your court system, but I lost over 2 million in an estate fight that should never have been entered into probate. The judges made so many errors against the law I did consider suicide. Some judges ignore the law and common sense.
some think they are god. I cannot justify taking a human life, but none of us know what happened in that garage. None of us know why in the world they both violated a restraining order or why Ms. Mack placed her and her child in harms way. No one knows who pushed whose buttons in order for this to happen. I am not sure it will be accurate in court. I did hopefully show that it is not worth arguing over money. Everyone lost here, there are no winners, the lawyers will wind up owning half of a long standing family business one person is dead, the other may as well be and three children lost people they love. Civil suits will be filed and lawyers will make more money. No one thought this through, no one put the children first, but the lawyers will get paid, and go on to the next human mess.

Posted by: Sue at Jul 6, 2006 2:13:06 AM

"None of us can know what happened in that garage."

Yeah, well, Sue, we can know at least one thing that happened, unless you're really trying to defend this fucker: he stabbed his ex wife to death after a long process of harassing her. Hm, you wouldn't be trying to avoid that fact, would you?

Posted by: ginmar at Jul 6, 2006 9:42:53 AM