The Countess

Book Review: Best Lesbian Erotica 2012

Best Lesbian Erotica 2012
Edited by Kathleen Warnock

I have always enjoyed reading lesbian literature. It's not nearly as popular as other forms of erotic literature, like paranormals, bondage, steampunk, and male/male. I tend to not follow the trends anyway. Show me a good lesbian story and I'll show you a happy reader. Lesbian fiction is catching on now so maybe soon it will get the attention it deserves.

I enjoyed “Best Lesbian Erotica 2012”, which didn't surprise me. Each story was unique and very arousing. Being bisexual, I of course enjoy good sapphic fiction. The following stories were my favorites:

“Blood Lust” by Giselle Renard. I’ve never thought of cutting as particularly sexy but I can see how it can be a sexual release with this story. The bloodletting was incredibly arousing, moreso than I expected it to be. This one was a new experience for me. I welcome new experiences.

“The Produce Queen” by Michelle Brennan. I love stories with fruit and veggies as erotic tools. This one delivers!

“Rebel Girl” by Kirsty Logan. This very sexy tale had two women dancing around each other for the longest time before they consummated their relationship. I liked that they started off with men who were not nearly as sexy as they were together.

“Touched” by Amy Butcher. I grew up Catholic and went to a Catholic school so I know how repressive these places can be. I don’t know what was sexier about this story – the anticipation or the incessant flirting. This story is a promise of things to come and things that had been. I liked the cognitive dissonance in the girl who resisted. That’s so true to life.

As I had expected, every one of these stories was highly sensuous, very arousing, and well-written. I’m not into the Penthouse Letters variety of erotic writing. These stories turned me on in more ways than I could count. These writers are very talented and it shows in the wide variety of stories to read. You can count on Babeland to deliver fantastic erotic literature and sex toys.

Babeland Review: Solar Bullet

When I first heard about solar powered sex toys, I had to try the wave of the future. So the moment I had a chance to review the Solar Bullet I jumped at the chance. Here's the Babeland description of this delightful sex toy: "Get off on saving the planet with the Solar Bullet vibe. Eight hours of exposure to sunshine provides one hour of blissful two-speed vibration against your clit, balls, perineum... you decide. Makes a perfect gift for your favorite tree-hugging pleasure-seeker, or bring it on your next camping trip. To top it all off, the box is printed to environmentally responsible Forest Stewardship Council (FSC) standards."

I wanted to test this baby out and see for myself whether or not a solar powered sex toy could hold a charge.

It sure does. Much better than the solar powered purple Halloween lights I bought at the same time this bullet arrived in the mail. I live in an apartment in New England and this time of year the sun drops from the sky at about 4:30 in the afternoon. Not much time for sunlight. Still, this solar bullet was able to build and maintain a nice charge for many hours. I wish my Halloween lights would have done that but they didn't. The solar bullet proved to me that solar powered objects need not be a lot of work and aggravation to charge and operate.

I didn't have to rely only on sunlight, either. I kept the solar bullet and my Halloween lights beneath a bedroom lamp an entire morning and afternoon. The solar bullet has worked since like a charm. The Halloween lights? Not so much. It shouldn't be that hard for those things to light up, but they won't. Maybe I should plug the Halloween lights into the solar bullet's power pack, and maybe they'll finally accept a charge. Nah, not a good idea. I returned the Halloween lights to the store but I've been using this solar bullet nearly every night and it's given me the most amazing orgasms.

This solar bullet is much more powerful than other clitoral vibrators I own. It packs its power directly onto my clit with vibrations more intense than the the other sex toys I use. The only disadvantage is the first time I used it I came too quickly. It felt that good. Then again, I'd been eager to use it all day so I was already revved up. Since then I've spaced out my orgasms and the solar bullet keeps me happy for as long as I like. When I come with this vibrator I double over with pleasure. That's how good it feels. All I need do is sit in near my bedroom window and the light that manages to make it into the apartment charges it just fine. I then top it off by sitting the solar bullet under my bedroom lamp. A light on the side lets me know it's charging.

I highly recommend this delightful sex toy to anyone who wants to try out a solar powered vibrator. I've never used anything like this before and it was great fun. It's small enough for travel and I don't need to plug it in (obviously) so it can sit near a hotel room window and it will charge just fine. This powerful bullet packs a wallop, too. I know those reading my review will enjoy is as much as I have.

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Read my other Babeland Sex Toys Reviews here on my blog, and don't forget my Sex Toys Reviews Category.

Come To My New Blog And Web Site!

I have a new blog and web site, and I'm inviting everyone to it. This blog/web site focuses on my erotic writing. I will continue to post sex toys reviews on this blog. So, if you want to keep up with me, visit me at my new digs.

Elizabeth Black - Blog and Web site

See you there!

Lizzie

Babeland Review: Lelo Flickering Touch Candle

I have always loved Lelo products so imagine my delight when Lelo came out with its own line of massage candles! The scents sounded so incredibly delightful it was hard to choose just one, so I chose what sounded to me like the most exotic and romantic scent: Lelo Flickering Touch Massage Candle in Snow Pear and Cedarwood. Other scents include vanilla and creme de cacoa, and black pepper and pomegranate.

This isn't your average massage candle in a metal tin that smells like it belongs in a head shop. This candle comes in a classy shiny black container with a silver lid and green handle. The scent is delicate and alluring, exactly what I wanted. I imagined fresh spring blossoms falling from a Japanese cherry tree into a stream when I smelled it. The oil itself is smooth and warm. Not the least bit cloying or sticky. The slick oil flowed like a dream over my skin, warming me as my husband massaged me and making me relax like never before. This oil is infused with vitamin E and you can tell by the feel of it. This oil moisturized my skin, which is important to me since I moisturize daily after every shower.

We love foot rubs in this house since I have sensitive feet and my husband is often on his feet at work during the day. This massage candle is perfect for relaxing after both of us endured a long day at work. Feeling the warm oil between my toes and especially on my arches made me relax so much I could have fallen asleep on the couch. My husband massaged my legs up to my knees with this amazing oil. A little went a long way, too. I can always count on Lelo to create incredible products and their line of massage candles is no different. I'm very satisfied with my candle and the oil it creates, and so is my husband. Even better, this candle burns for 36 hours so there's plenty of time and oil to go around. It will be a very long time before we run out. Then we try another scent! What fun!

Here are the containers for the other two candles.

Buy your sex toys at Babeland!

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Read my other Babeland Sex Toys Reviews here on my blog, and don't forget my Sex Toys Reviews Category.

Babeland Review: Slimline Pirates Rocket Vibrator

Pirates Rocket Vibrator - with abject apologies to Robert Lewis Stevenson and "Treasure Island"

Fifteen men on a dead man's chest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Drink and the devil had done for the rest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
A vibe that surpasses the best of the best
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
With gleaming gems on a rounded base
And a velvety finish to suit her taste
Her climax will make her little heart race
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

Fifteen men of 'em stiff and stark
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Ten of the crew had the lover's mark!
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Three designs to make her sweat
Two vibe patterns her desires are met
And intensity levels she'll never forget
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

Fifteen men of 'em good and true
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Ev'ry man jack could ha' sailed her virtue,
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Skull and crossbones on the shaft
Batteries, buy them in a two-pack
Eight inches of joy without any slack
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

This delightful pocket vibe is patterned after the popular "Pirates" and "Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge" porn movie series. This movie series has released a series of pirate-themed sex toys that are quite amusing to behold - and joy to use. The Pirates Rocket Vibrator comes in three kitschy designs, all shown below.

All you need are two C batteries to get you started. The shaft, made of hard plastic, is velvety soft, and the vibrations intense and enjoyable. The pulsation patterns will send you into the orgasm stratosphere: undulating, pulsating, and continuous. Whilst the shaft itself is eight inches long, six inches of it is insertable. This vibe may be used vaginally or on your clitoris, or a combination of both. If you enjoy deeper penetration, this vibe is well suited to your needs. It's not a G-spot vibe, but it's sure great fun to use. The pirate-themed tattoos on the shaft give this jewel-encrusted vibe a kitschy look. It's a fun toy to use and view. And it will deliver you orgasms so intense you'll start speaking in Buccaneer. Yarrrr!!!

Buy your sex toys at Babeland!

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Read my other Babeland Sex Toys Reviews here on my blog, and don't forget my Sex Toys Reviews Category. Now shiver your timbers and buy yourself some pirate booty!

Pleasurists #116 - And I'm Editor's Pick Again!!

The Countess' Note: OMG I won "Editor's Pick"!!! This is the second time I made "Editor's Pick". I was hoping I would win this time. Yeah, she loves and hates the review at the same time. So do I. It's very over-the-top. Here's my review so you may laugh and cringe at the same time:

The Countess: Babeland Review - Pirates Pleasure Ring

Yarrr!!!

Forbidden Fruit by Bountiful

Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.

Did you miss Pleasurists #115? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #117? Be sure to read the submission guidelines and then use the submission form and submit it before Sunday February 13th @ 11:59pm Pacific.

Want to win some swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

• Mini Pre-Birthday Bash Giveaway! Deadline: February 9th @ 11:59pm Eastern.
• It’s All About Me Giveaway Deadline: February 11th.
• Wine and Dine Your Favorite Toy Deadline: February 13th @ 6pm Eastern.
• Happy Birthday Giveaway Deadline: February 13th @ 11:59pm Pacific.
• February’s Sweet Giveaway Deadline: February 13th @ 11:59pm Eastern.
• Get Your Heart On Deadline: February 14th @ 11:59pm Pacific.
• Keep the Spice of Valentine’s Day Alive! Deadline: February 15th @ 11am Central.
• $50 Gift Card Giveaway Deadline: February 20th @ Midnight.
• The iCandy Sex Toy Giveaway Deadline: February 28th @ Midnight.

Editor’s Pick

• Pirates Pleasure Ring by The Countess

Ye have two choices between scribbles – the purple Maltese cross or the black skull n’ bandana. Buy one of each and turn on the saucy maids and/’r cockswains with your Cap’n At Full Mast! She’ll never turn ye away from her binnacle ever again, matey. And he’ll let you into his Poop Deck with yer mighty multi-barreled pistol! Here’s th’ best news o’all – this scabbard guard vibrates like a schooner hit by yer cannons!!!

Note: I both love and hate this review at the same time. I adore unique reviews like this and find the pirate speak amusing and awesome, plus there’s a pirate cat picture.

Editor
Scarlet Lotus

On to the reviews…

Vibrators

• Bon Bon by Bzzingbee
• Black Magic Bullet by Venus
• Jimmyjane Form 3 by True Pleasures
• Seti Toyfriend by Red Vinyl Kitty
• Seti Toyfriend by LucyLemonade
• Death by Orgasm: Vampire by Ashes
• Daring Dolphin by Alan & Michele
• Vibrating Dilator Set by VenusToyTrap
• Flirty G by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• LELO Soraya by Angel
• Je Joue G-Ki by VenusToyTrap
• X-tassie Aurora by Nadia West
• Jopen Vr9 Vanity by Epiphora
• Vibratex Mystic Wand by Epiphora
• L’amour Passion G by Screaming Violet

Dildos

• Made to Pleasure Curve by Bella
• Tantus Feeldoe by Cat Q
• LELO Ella by Bella
• Tantus O2 Mark by Isabel
• Tantus Goliath by Rayne

Anal Toys

• Nexus Medium G-Play by Mistress Kay
• Onyx Wand by Tenuki Tea
• Dual Inked Glass Probe by Mistress Kay
• Tantus Zing by Beanfiddler
• Ophoria A-Chain by Angel deSanguine
• iRide by Mistress Kay
• L’Amour Probe by Nicky

Toys for Cocks

• Gear Essentials Titan by the bedroom blogger
• Shane’s World Campus Hottie by Alan & Michele
• Pirates Pleasure Ring by The Countess

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

• Blossom Organics Warming by Sexorcism
• Blossom Organics Moisturizing by Kate
• Nipple Nibblers by Bella
• KY Yours + Mine by Evil Poptart
• Intimate Organics Cleansing Gel by Buzzvibe
• Intimate Shaving Kit by Mistress Kay
• Edible Body Chocolate by the bedroom blogger
• Jimmyjane Afterglow by Rayne

BDSM/Fetish

• Handcrafted Leather Bit Gag by Mistress Kay
• Sex Kitten Nips by Bella
• Wartenberg Pinwheel by The Countess

Adult Books/Games

• Sweet Love by Bzzingbee
• Him & Her by Beanfiddler
• What’s Up Down There? by Mistress Kay
• Karsai Nei Tsang: Therapeutic Massage for the Sexual Organs by True Pleasures

Adult DVDs & Porn

• Roulette Toronto by Bzzingbee
• Balls Deep by Chops McGruff
• Idolize My Ass – Rachel’s Power Ass by J.D. Bauchery
• The Sex Files II – A Dark XXX Parody by The Porn Librarian
• Sinderella & Me by J.D. Bauchery
• Real Female Orgasms 13 by J.D. Bauchery
• Seven Minutes In Heaven 2: Tender Hearted by Angel deSanguine

Sex Furniture & Position Aids

• Liberator Jaz by Kitty Stryker
• Liberator Hipster by Mystress Lady Evyl
• Liberator Zeppelin Cocoon by Rayne

Miscellaneous

• Hitachi Magic Wand Controller by VenusToyTrap
• Deluxe Packing Pouch by Bella
• Sailor Soft Pack by Bella
• Risque Valentine Candy Hearts by True Pleasures
• Incoqnito Necktie by Angel deSanguine
• Je Joue Ami by Epiphora

Babeland Review: Pirates Pleasure Ring

Avast ye maties! Do yerself a favor and slap on th' Pirates Pleasure Ring, a wonderfully stretchy and kitschy sex toy that fits around yer Jolly Roger! Fer the landlubbers out thar who ain't familiar with ye pirates of lore, this cracking cock ring was inspired by the porn DVD series "Pirates" and "Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge", two of the most popular pirate porn DVDs out thar. The movies star porn legends such as Jesse Jane, Sasha Grey, and Evan Stone. Ye've never seen scallywags and picaroons such as these in many a moon!

Ye have two choices between scribbles - the purple Maltese cross or the black skull n' bandana. Buy one of each and turn on the saucy maids and/'r cockswains with your Cap'n At Full Mast! She'll never turn ye away from her binnacle ever again, matey. And he'll let you into his Poop Deck with yer mighty multi-barreled pistol! Here's th' best news o'all - this scabbard guard vibrates like a schooner hit by yer cannons!!!

Ye now can buzz yer way to a massive ARRR-gasm with this kick'n cock ring. Narey a better nor more valuable ring has been found even in Davy Jones' Locker. It stretches to fit any size Pirate cutlass. The mini vibe is shaped like a skull embossed on shiny gold. Add this cock ring to yer own treasures and seduce the saucy maids n' cockswains with yer massive flintlock! The ring is stretchy n' comfortable to wear. It doesn't even pinch yer nads. And it looks like a million Pieces of Eight! Board her ship or notch his rullock with confidence when you use this incredible cock ring.

So you want t' talk like a scurvy pirate? Try this web site which is a tad like a Pirate Babelfish. Just plug in yer ramblings and the computer program translates yer speech into Buccaneer! So now all your sex toys reviews can be translated int' Pirate-speak. Yarrr!

Buy yer sex toys at Babeland!

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Read me other Babeland Sex Toys Reviews here on me blog, and don't forget me Sex Toys Reviews Category. Now jump that plank and buy yerself some treasures!

Babeland Review - Best Women's Erotica 2010

Being a writer of erotic literature, I was delighted to sit down and devour Best Women's Erotica 2010. This particular series is very well respected in erotic quarters, as are both the publisher Cleis Press and the editor, VioletBlue. I saw many familiar names penning the stories such as K. D. Grace, Rachel Kramer Bussel, Sommer Marsden, and Alyson Tyler. I've had internet contact with some of them via my own submission process and Facebook. The stories with in this book are cream of the crop; the best erotic short fiction out there.

This particular book is geared towards straight women with women as protagonists. You will find no subjugation of women within the pages, and each female character stars in her own sexually empowering and exciting story. The eighteen stories are contemporary and very imaginative. They are also so hot you'll need to turn on the air conditioning, even in the dead of winter with snow on the ground. Case in point is K. D. Grace's story "Veggin", which was one of the first ones I read. Although I'm sure many women have either imagined or actually used carrots, zucchini, and cucumbers as sex toys, Grace ratchets up the heat level with some very descriptive and sensuous action regarding a woman invading her sexy male neighbor's vegetable garden. Food continues to be a major theme in Bussel's story "Secret Service", which is about a food establishment catering to women that offers another form of sensuous pleasure behind closed doors. I won't spoil the story by saying what that is. You'll have to read the book to find out!

This book is ideal for couples reading sexy stories to each other by candlelight to set a sensuous mood before a night of hot sex. Or enjoy them on your own in the bath up to your neck in fragrant bubbles. I read several of these stories more than once because I was in the mood for them and because they really are that good.

This book isn't rote fucking in a Penthouse Letters style. These are very well-written stories with plot and character development. Plus they are only about 5,000 words each, which is quite a mean feat when it comes to kick-ass writing. Short stories are not easy to write. You have to get a lot of information out there - with the emotion that goes with it - in only a few thousand words. If this is your first time reading erotic literature or if you're tired of wasting your time with poorly-written smut, definitely pick up a copy of this book. You won't be sorry.

Babeland Review: Chippendales Diva Sensual Massager

Chippendales Diva Sensual Massager is a delightful elite massager ideal for couples. It's described as follows: "Get closer than ever before with the couple-friendly, splash-proof Chippendales Diva vibrator. The curve, broad reach, and thin profile of the Chippendales Diva make it ideal for nestling between two bodies during sex — give it a try, and you'll soon realize why so many couples have been happily adding vibrators to their bedroom fun. Of course, the Chippendales Diva is perfect for solo use, as well: the contour allows you to cup the clit and vulva for a fully satisfying sensation. A locking mechanism makes for easy travel (no accidental switching-on in the security line!), and the elegant appearance makes it an ideal gift."

I chose this massager because my husband has erectile dysfunction and I wanted to use a massager we would both enjoy that didn't rely on an erect penis to give us both satisfaction. We like to lie in bed at night and massage each other's feet so sitting this massager between our legs right at groin level gave us both intense and pleasant vibrations while we went about the joy of playing with each other's toes. I like the way this massager caresses my vulva and clit simultaneously, giving me endless hours of erotic pleasure. Plus it just feels so damned good! I also like elegant and elite massagers that don't look like sex toys so this one by Chippendales was just the type of massager that appeals to me very much. I can also use this massager solo, which I like to do. I like clit stimulators very much and this one vibrates around my clit and vulva to give me the thrill of stimulation and pleasant vibrations from a gentle purr to a ramping like an earthquake. Best of all is using it with my husband when we relax in bed for the night. While he doesn't come the vibrations feel very good especially when I'm rubbing massage oil all over his feet like he does to me. I usually come by grinding my hips into the massager and getting off on the foot massage.

This massager cleans up easily with soap and water. It's splashproof so getting it a little wet won't hurt it although I don't drown it in water. The black case is very classy and I can leave it on my nightstand without embarrassment. It's not like it's a two foot long purple rubber dick-shaped double dildo, you know. LOL! This is a massager I'm proud to show off.

If you're looking for a very nice couples massager, especially if you need to think outside the box when it comes to sex, the Chippendales Diva Sensual Massager is a great one to own. You'll enjoy closeness with your partner and intense orgasms.

Babeland Review: Oasis Slimline Vibrators

Oasis Slimline Vibrators are therapeutic sexual devices used primarily for healing the vagina and helping it retain or gain elasticity. Also known as vaginal dilators, they come in three graduated sizes with the intent that the "slim" one is used first, then the "midi", and then the "maxi". That they vibrate is unusual, since most vaginal dilators don't vibrate. The vibrations enable blood flow, enable healing, and make the use of the dilators more enjoyable. Oasis Slimline Vibrators are not meant for sexual pleasure alone, although they are enjoyable to use. They are therapeutic devices for vaginal dilation or healing.

They are long - and at first their size can look quite intimidating - but they aren't meant to be completely inserted. The idea is to help your vagina relax so only insert what you need. They are made of hard plastic and they use 3 AAA or 2 AA batteries, depending on the size of the vibrator. They're colored in pleasant pastels and each vibe comes with its own lube sample. You can buy one for $25.00 or all three for $75.00 - a very reasonable price considering how and why they are used.

Vaginal dilators are most often used under the four following conditions:

* Women who have painful intercourse (dyspareunia) or the same following hysterectomy use them to help their vaginas relax so that sex play - especially any kind of insertion in the vagina - is more pleasurable and less painful. These dilators help them to train their vaginas to get used to larger insertions.

* Transgendered women with new vaginas use them to help the vagina to heal properly;

* Women going through or having gone through menopause may use them to help retain their vagina's elasticity;

* Women who have undergone chemotherapy or other surgery use them to promote healing.

Oasis Slimline Vibrators are unusual in that they vibrate, which helps to bring blood flow into the vagina, enable the healing process to progress, and - a nice addition - they feel good! I'd recommend using Oasis Slimline Vibrators with plenty of lube because they are made of hard plastic and are quite rigid. Vaginal dilators likely would feel more comfortable and be more effective when used with lube anyway so using lube is a good suggestion. Oasis Slimline Vibrators come with samples of lube, so Oasis obviously knows what it's doing.

I don't have a personal need for Oasis Slimline Vibrators - not yet anyway - but I wanted to try them out to see how they felt. So, I used them the first and second days of my period, when I'm very tender and any kind of vaginal insertion feels rather uncomfortable and painful. I used the lube packet anyway even though I was bleeding. Naturally, I started off with "Slim" and moving it around inside me felt good and it wasn't the least bit threatening. The vibrations definitely brought blood flow to my vagina (not counting the menstrual blood) and I became slowly aroused as I used the "Slim". Once I felt sufficiently relaxed, I moved on to "Midi" and then to "Maxi". "Midi" felt more comfortable for me, since I was very tender, and "Maxi" was a bit much. I preferred "Midi". All three were a joy to use and for the first time in a long time I was able to enjoy insertion during the early time of my period when I'm the most cramped and the most uncomfortable.

I will go through menopause in a few years so I wanted to have the Oasis Slimline Vibrators at hand to use when the time comes. I like the idea of vaginal dilators because they are made with women's pleasure and sexual health in mind. They are very woman-positive devices. Oasis Slimline Vibrators are fine products at a reasonable price. If you ever find that you are in need of vaginal dilators, I recommend Oasis Slimline Vibrators because they are easy to use, not overly expensive, and they vibrate. The vibrations alone make them unusual and pleasant to use.

Shop at Babeland for all your sex toys needs.