What, No Bondage Dungeon?

I don't own my dream house yet but when I do I now know to avoid these eight most overrated home projects. In order they are 1. whirlpool bath, 2. room additions, 3. "Versailles" kitchens, 4. marble counters (or other porous surfaces), 5. deck off the master bedroom, 6. elaborate home theatres, 7. hot tub, and 8. overly complicated home automation.

My main question is: what about the bondage dungeon?

While most of the stuff on the list doesn't interest me, a few do, like the whirlpool bath, "Versaille" kitchen, and hot tub. I'd like the hot tub on the deck outside our kitchen and living room so we can enjoy our champagne while soaking. The deck off the master bedroom isn't a bad idea either because I'd turn it into a greenhouse for my plants and especially my herbs. But I ask again...

What about the bondage dungeon?

With all the sex toys I own I need a bondage dungeon. I need a special closet to house my vibrators, dildos, and other gear. I want a special dresser just for my LELO toys. But I'm not into bondage per se. I just like having sex. If you want a bondage dungeon, here's what you need:

Spanking horse

Massage table

Hooks in the ceiling for chains, restraints, etc.

Bondage chairs

Leg and arm stocks

Head and wrist yoke

Bondage cross

I'd also love to hear my favorite music piped into the room via my iPod. I'd need a small fridge for my glass dildos as well as a small cooker with a pan if I want to heat them up. A hot tub or whirlpool bath in this room would be a keeper. I'd also need a flat screen TV and all my porn dvds in the room so we can either listen to music or watch a movie while going at it. I love to read or watch movies in the bath so I'd have my favorite bath oils and bubbles on a table near the tub or pool. I'd keep my favorite sex toys on a wooden table in the center of the room so I can grab them whenever I need them. My electro-sex toys (something new I'm into) would go on another table near one of my bondage chairs.

I can imagine my bondage dungeon done up like an Edwardian room - lace curtains covered by thick red or green velvet drapes, ornate oak tables with antique oil lamps lit to set a mood, fairy lights around the ceiling, huge floor plants, ornate glass bottles in the windows to catch the light, stained glass windows, ceiling fans, and large Oriental rugs throughout the room. I'd have a special table just for my incense. I like Japanese incense, mostly white cloud and Kyoto cherry blossom. They will leave a delicate scent in the room.

I think I can get into this. So tell me, what would you put in your bondage dungeon?