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January 06, 2006

Hot Screeching Monkey Sex

Now that I have your attention with that headline...

I couldn't leave for the conference without letting this get by me. A researcher has found that hot sex can cure the common cold. [via BlondeSense.] The researcher is Swiss. Figures the Scandanavians come up with cool stuff like this. Linneaus corrected me. I was thinking "Sweden" instead of "Switzerland", then my mind got stuck in Scandanavia. That's what I get for being in a rush.

Here's the dirt:

Swiss scientist Manfred Schedlovski claims his experiments show that regular love-making increases the amount of phagocyte cells, which boost the body's immune system and fight the microbes that cause colds.

He claims the number of phagocytes - which attack alien antibodies, causing them to self-destruct - significantly increases during sexual intercourse.

And according to Schedlovski's research, the number of phagocyte cells can even double after an orgasm, allowing alien microbes to be detected and destroyed more quickly.

Alright, readers, get off my blog right now, and go have some hot screeching monkey sex. Chances are that hot screeching monkey sex boosts the immune system so much that it could prevent a cold, let alone cure it.

If anyone gets sick while I'm gone, and does not heed this fun remedy, you're going to get a tongue-lashing from me. [Pun intended.] evil_smiley.gif

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Update: Schedlowski has also studied the effect of prolactin on male orgasm. An article at SexandDrugs.Info discussed the drug Cabergoline, which is marketed under the trade name of Dostinex. Cabergoline has been found to increase orgasms in men. The drug lowers prolactin levels in men. Prolactin "also has the effect of reducing a man’s desire for more sex by preventing new erections. Cabergoline has been found to to minimize the effects of the hormone prolactin, which is produced by men at the point of orgasm. As a result, some subjects who tried the drug found that they were able to have multiple orgasms in rapid succession."

Dr. Manfred Schedlowski has been studying the drug. Here is more information on its effect and on prolactin:

In one study, 60 subjects, all healthy males, between the ages of 22 and 31, normally needed a break of 19 minutes between lovemaking sessions. However, after taking Cabergoline, they were able to have several orgasms within a few minutes. Medical psychologist Manfred Schedlowski, who was involved in the trials at Essen in Germany, said the drug raised the libido to enable the male to orgasm again more quickly.

Schedlowski said, "We saw that prolactin rises after orgasm and then thought maybe prolactin is a negative feedback system. Subjects who took this drug had decreased prolactin levels, and reported their orgasm was better and there was a shorter refractory period. We interviewed these subjects and found they were able to have multiple orgasms in very rapid succession. This is sitting very nicely with our hypothesis that orgasms and sexual drive are steered by prolactin and dopamine in the brain."

There didn't seem to be any side effects, except one that was reported. The only bad thing was that "[t]here’s evidence that the release of prolactin in the brain, which surges during orgasm, promotes the growth of new neurons in the brain--a process called neurogenesis. Researchers at the University of Cal-gary discovered that the release of prolactin spurs the growth of new brain cells in the front regions of the brain involved in smell. "

Any drug that makes sex better sounds good to me. However, it looks like focusing on pleasing the little brain prevents the big brain from growing as many new neurons as it otherwise would if prolactin levels were higher.

If you want to read some interesting articles about impotence, head over to the International Journal of Impotence Research. The Journal addresses both male and female sexual dysfunction.

Posted on January 6, 2006 at 10:44 AM | Permalink

Comments

Great. Now I just need to find a partner who wants to have hot sex as much as I do.

Not to be pedantic, Trish, but the researcher is Swiss, which means that unless he's relocated, he's in Switzerland, not Scandinavia. Perhaps you read "Swiss" as "Swedish"?

Posted by: Linnaeus at Jan 6, 2006 11:06:25 AM

Yup, you're right, Linnaeus. I did read "Swiss" as "Swedish". The "Sw" threw me off. That's what I get for being in a rush.

Hot sex is great when you can get it. Plus, it has the benefit of possibly curing colds. Can't complain about that.

Posted by: The Countess at Jan 6, 2006 11:17:57 AM

Yup, you're right, Linnaeus. I did read "Swiss" as "Swedish". The "Sw" threw me off. That's what I get for being in a rush.

Hot sex is great when you can get it. Plus, it has the benefit of possibly curing colds. Can't complain about that.

Posted by: The Countess at Jan 6, 2006 11:19:33 AM

Maybe I can use that as a line..."Hey, I can help cure that cold, honey."

If I don't get slapped, who knows? :)

Posted by: Linnaeus at Jan 6, 2006 12:12:42 PM

I've got to get my wife reading blogs.

Posted by: Ron O. at Jan 6, 2006 12:56:08 PM

I can't believe that... I always complained my husband for having a lot of sex with me, but this article made me think about that.

Posted by: Nataly at Jan 6, 2006 4:22:55 PM

I knew I should have had really hot sex with my girlfriend when I saw her on New Year's - that way I wouldn't have caught the cold then...

Posted by: Alon Levy at Jan 7, 2006 3:23:09 AM

Too bad they didn't post a link to the gentleman's actual study.

Posted by: mythago at Jan 7, 2006 3:16:36 PM

Andrew Weil had a great anecdote in one of his books about a patient who cured himself of a nasty cold by an all-night sex romp. Next to Weil's claim that he rid himself of an allergy to cats during an acid trip, it's one of the best stories I've read in his books. Thanks for sharing that one, Trish.

Posted by: DP_in_SF at Jan 8, 2006 9:25:32 PM

No wonder I haven't had a cold in the 2 years I've been with my husband!! ;)

Posted by: AldeaMB at Jan 9, 2006 8:46:01 AM

Actually, the correct term is wild passionate monkey sex. Duh, Trish, you've got to get your terms in order.

Posted by: ginmar at Jan 9, 2006 10:48:11 AM

I'm back from the con, everyone. Thanks for posting a link to the study, Mythago. I'll definitely read it - tomorrow. I'm beat.

Ginmar, I thought wild screeching monkey sex was the scientifically correct term. ;)

Posted by: The Countess at Jan 9, 2006 5:50:04 PM

Chimpanzees, surely?

But while we're arguing taxonomy, somebody else is probably getting the hot sex.

Posted by: Dave Bell at Jan 12, 2006 3:24:55 AM

Not chimps, bonobos!
I wonder if masturbation works too... (she muses sadly).

Posted by: Anna Feruglio Dal Dan at Jan 13, 2006 9:11:40 AM

i had hot sex with a monkey one time. ow i still feel its huge cock in my pussy it hurt and was sooooo good

Posted by: tristen at Feb 2, 2006 5:32:09 PM

i had hot sex with a monkey one time. ow i still feel its huge cock in my pussy it hurt and was sooooo good

Posted by: tristen at Feb 2, 2006 5:32:29 PM

Oh, boy, a new breed of troll! As far as I know, monkeys don't have huge cocks. Someone needs a better lay. ;)

Posted by: The Countess at Feb 2, 2006 8:21:59 PM

my girl prefers llamas to monkeys, I think its because they spit!

Posted by: terry at Apr 25, 2006 3:40:21 PM

I guess spitting is preferable to flinging poo. ;)

Posted by: The Countess at Apr 25, 2006 3:49:59 PM