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August 17, 2005

Vagina Dentata, Anyone?

Vivek Krishnamurthy at The Reaction was just astounded to find out that women are buying designer vaginas. He'll be very surprised to learn that I've already heard of them.

A character on Nip/Tuck had a Real Doll made based on her, and she wanted the doll's vagina to look "prettier". She had one of the plastic surgeons examine her own vagina and labia to reconstruct the doll. It was a rather bizarre episode, but that entire show was bizarre. Whatever happened to Nip/Tuck, anyway? It disappeared. The Count and I were hooked on that show. It had characters with no redeeming qualities whatsoever. We like that kind of stuff. Shadenfreunde is our friend. evil_smiley.gif

I bet this news will give The Reaction the willies: Salons are practicing anal bleaching. Is your butthole an unattractive brown? Bleach it and it will look pale, pink, and beautiful! Here's how the Village Voice article linked in this paragraph described anal bleaching: "[Pink Cheeks salon owner Cindy Esser-Thorin] told me that she would wax the anus first, then apply Pink Cheeks Amazing Anal Bleaching Cream, a product the salon developed, to the area. I scanned the label: The active ingredient is hydroquinone (4 percent), a substance used to lighten dark skin, commonly found in products used by African Americans to even out skin tone. "We just tried it on some buttholes and realized it worked," said Esser-Thorin."

This is just so wrong. Don't people go to salons to get plain old manicures anymore? I wouldn't bleach my cat Lucky's butthole, but his butthole is a nice, pretty white. No need to. Heh.

Posted on August 17, 2005 at 09:49 AM | Permalink

Comments


'..pornographic magazines depicting the ideal vagina that they would like to have, and some girls as young as fifteen are coming in with their mothers to have their vaginas altered.'


Hmm. I wasn't aware that mainstream porn magazines have photographs of women's internal organs.

Ergh, I really wish people would stop using 'vagina' when they mean the vulva. They are two different things!

Posted by: Baubo at Aug 17, 2005 10:02:20 AM

A coworker once regaled me with the tale of a woman she met who collected dog semen for a living. Anal bleaching now joins that on my list of least desirable jobs.

And I know this is foul but I can't help it: You know how bleached hair turns green if you spend too much time in the pool? Well, um...

Posted by: kcb at Aug 17, 2005 11:10:51 AM

Well , when the gay lobby finds out about
this there goes the worlds supply of bleach

I guess this means that the democrats will
be making price concessions for bleach ,?

Posted by: Rod at Aug 19, 2005 10:03:50 AM

"Well , when the gay lobby finds out about
this there goes the worlds supply of bleach

I guess this means that the democrats will
be making price concessions for bleach ,?"


Old urine can also be used to bleach things if we ever run out. Just to let anyone know who cares about what Rod just posted, not that I think there are many who do. This is one of the totally useless factoids I picked up from my interest in Native Americans lore.

Native Americans used old urine to bleach buffalo and deer hides and that's how they got those lovely beige tones for many of their robes and ceremonial outfits. Also the occasional white robe/dress for special events.

Needless to say the need of a white robe/dress in a hurry probably led to kidney failure on the part of an entire household; as I think that's where they got most of the supply. I actually wondered why they didn't just use animal urine. I came to the conclusion that it would have been too difficult to collect AFTER my dog's vet asked me to bring him a urine sample from my cocker spaniel. Like how the heck can anyone do that???

Short answer: they can't.

Just to let anyone know, who was interested, the supply of bleach in the world is one of those resources that is limitless and renewable.

So don't worry about it.

Posted by: NYMOM at Aug 19, 2005 2:27:37 PM